In all honesty, the biggest reason for me to go to VCU was that it just felt right. My gut was telling me to. And while that may seem like a stupid reason to some for such a big decision, that seems like a perfectly acceptable reason to me. I feel at home (t)here. when I walk to class I'm not feeling wrong like when I was going to TCC (could also be for other reasons but I'm attributing it to not being right). My apartment feels like home. Hanging with Joey feels right. Even my anxiety is considerably less. Hanging with newish people isn't as big a deal as it usually is. I'm not freaking out and trying to avoid hanging out like I usually do. I can't explain why this is, nor do I know why, but thats it.

I'm currently in North Carolina for the weekend with my family. I can't wait to get back to school. Lets just hope it never rains ever again.

The moving process was fun and stressful and still not done. I moved all of my big stuff in like chairs, love seat and my bed. I still need to move a desk and all of my clothes. Its all so stressful, I feel like I'll forget stuff.

My mom and I did a lot as well. After this weekend I really appreciate all she does for me. She helped me move in, she cleaned the entire apartment, she helped me with classes and financial aid stuff and everything. When I think about if I had to do all of this by myself, I'm sure I would fail at it all. I don't know how some of my friends do it.

Its exciting and terrifying all at the same time. I cannot wait for it to begin.

. Things are going great for me, but for some reason I still feel off. I just keep complaining and searching for things to whine about. I don't know why I do these things to myself. I think as a pessimist, I just expect everything to be bad. Because, if they're good, its a nice surprise. But if they're bad... well, you weren't really let down.

. The rain was crazy today. I felt the typical disdain for it. I hate the rain because it makes me feel so greasy and uncomfortable. But today... the thunderstorm was crazy. I hung out with Alec and Nicklaus today. We then met up with Kurt and Shane for a little and headed over to Wawa. While we sat out front of Wawa listening to the homeless man's stories, the storm took off. The lightning lit up the sky like the sun. It was so bright with purple-pink light. I never pay attention to storms, since I hate them so much, but this one I noticed. There was one thunder that scared me so much I screamed. I felt the thud in my chest. It was the loudest thunder I've heard in my nineteen years.

. Another thing that should take me back to Thankful town: the homeless man. Listening to him talk about being in jail and living on the streets was interesting. I hated seeing that he bought beer and cigarettes with his money though. I wish he would spend the money sympathetic people give him on food or maybe save it for his future. But still. It kinda makes me happy about my life. For the simple and obvious fact that I'm not homeless. That I have an education, and am continuing to gain it. That I will never have to be in his shoes.

. Finally. I cut my hair. I dislike it, of course. I want my long hair back. WHEN WILL I LEARN?!